margaretrose,

I agree with lynn P. You are in a very slippery spot.

It would be best to get professional help to work through the obsession and devotion to helping out this man. While the relationship isn't sexual now, it sounds as though part of you is stuck living in a fantasy. Hoping that someday your wish might come true.

I'm no angel either, believe me. I just have a lot of experience living in fantasyland too. Fantasy is always better than non-fiction! Gentle hugs to you ~ I wish you the best.