I am wondering what else was going on with your t that day? Yes she is a professional with a job that requires an abundance of patience shande also is human. I believe it is hard for us therapy goers to see that it is not always our fault or our trigger. What I am trying to say is, yes, you may have done a certain behavior that triggered an emotional reaction from her and there were probably other factors that influenced her emotion. Was she hungry? What else did she have in the back of her mind?

Before I had tons of therapy I always thought it was all me, I am the one that was at fault, etc... there wasn't ever anything wrong with anyone else. Now I know that, yep I probably contribute (sometimes more than others) but it is not always my "stuff" that created the rupture. Let her own a little bit of this.

My t has gotten very irritated with my behaviors at times but he always makes it a point to say, "KC I do not like it when you do....... this behavior." He has emphasized this so much that I know he can separate how he feels about my doing x, y and z than how he feels about me. It was a valuable lesson for me to learn because before any relationship in my life was so black or white. It was on and perfect or it was over and never to be again. Every t relationship is different, however, I know for myself personally my own relationship with t has deepened immensly due to the whole proccess of rupture and repair.