Hi Jessica. I agree, let your granparents and aunt help you. Being "charity case" is your story of this, not theirs. I have paid for my niece's lessons, when her family couldn't possibly afford. It was not a charity. It was not pity. It is what family is about. Caring. There is a lot family can't do, but one thing they can, is to help young girl hang in there through this awful time with something like dance lessons.

And by the way, Jessica, just the way you write I can tell you are not stupid, quite to the contrary. And you are not boring, though considering the stuff you have to deal with, you may be feeling alienated from your easy-living friends, and thus boring. In actuality, it's more likely they are boring. These are heavy burdens you carry, and it is not suprising you have dark thoughts and feel bad about yourself, but you do not need to really be harsh with yourself, it's just a story trying to comprehend why things are going so bad, trying to keep you from having too many hopes so they don't get dashed. It's a form of defense against the outside badness

But life does not have to turn bad for you. You are not doomed. Your friends seem to be traveling on a flat wide highway, tucked comfortably in their plushy cars, while you have a rocky steep mountain to climb, with narrow crumbling trail, and scratchy shrubs, but you know you can walk that path, any path, just take one step, one foot in front of the other.