Chippie, welcome to the boards.

Most people that haven't done it really don't understand the tremendous amount of relief there is in SI. I have just recently stopped and it is very hard to do.

No one that knows me could understand my reasoning for it - it is a relief valve to stop the pressure and help me cope. There are many of us here that have experience to help and understand you.

You need to find out what the problem is, how to deal with the frustration instead of cutting. The "cat scratching" doesn't work for very long.

Do you have a therapist that you see, or someone that you can talk to? I have been seeing mine for about 2 1/2 years now and even though I fight him tooth & nail sometimes, he is the only one who accepts me as I am and has been there 24/7 to listen and help.

If there is anything I can do, please PM me and let me know - even if it is just to listen.

Mary Alice