((((((((sawe)))))))

T and I have talked about the fact that if I am a bad person, then everything makes sense in some kind of twisted way. If T loves me, and if I am a good person, it completely unravels a lifetime of beliefs and coping mechanisms.

And I have a giant fear that I don't really understand of accidentally getting it wrong. For some reason, it feels safer to think "i'm bad" then to think "I'm good" and to end up finding out that I'm wrong.

What if you ARE a good person, sawe? What would that mean??

(you know how *I* feel about you...)