[quote=skysblue;1951468]Improving - it's great that you know what your T does in RL. I have no idea what my T's lifestyle is. [quote]

skysblue, yes, I realize it is relatively unusual that I know so much about my T's day to day life. I guess there are many levels of change, and I have had to start at the most basic level. DBT talks about 'building a life worth living'. For me, that meant starting with very concrete changes such as being able to get out of bed, not cancelling on my friends, not calling in sick to work. These are the changes I can 'see', and the behaviours of T that I can see.

I hope I am learning from T's interpersonal behaviour, her emotional regulation etc in the way that you describe, but perhaps that is more subtle and not as immediately obvious to me? Argh, so much to change!