I think it is us, not the therapist. If a child has a really good upbringing they will have healthy boundaries, self worth, be able to express feelings and stand up for themselves. These experiences in life will foster trust with others and they won't expect people to harm them. These healthy people are flexible and can deal with most anything that comes at them.

Now the rest of us, who weren't as fortunate, come from a different angle. We don't trust, we expect others to hurt us, we can't stand up for ourselves or express our feelings. We project our past onto others and have transference. We feel bad about ourselves and get triggered very easily.

No matter what a therapist does, this therapist will trigger us. We have issues ripe to being triggered. Healthy people bump up against people all day long and do just fine. Those of us who have work to do, do not have this luxury.

With work you will get there, though..........

I have been fortunte to travel from the one side to the other.