My friend had a great birthday at this restaurant that gives birthday people free meals. I usually hate the food there but it's popular with the mature crowd. Last night the food was actually good, we had fun. I decided that this woman needs more "stuff" in her apartment like a hole in the head so I got her a book of stamps and a gift certificate to the local grocer who delivers. She had been quite ill with whooping cough of all things. So all in all it was good.

Today with T we spoke of the son and did some EMDR. It was great, I became more clear on what I wanted to do, where I was not acting as I desired, and what would my friend Jane have done, Jane who left us more then a year ago. Good stuff.

So let me try it out on you all. Instead of girlfriend being a princess.... She is a good looking young woman with an appetite for reading. She is very well read and well informed. She clearly loves my son. She made koogle for us last night, I had some later when I was hungry at midnight. She loves her cats and worries about them as though they were her kids. She is interested in Vet science and will probably end up working with animals eventually. She helps me remember doggie meds if she doesn't give them herself.

See, I am trying to be positive. My Jane would have taken the time to ask her about herself and really listen and I have not done that. That is my goal. What does this girl like? What interests her? What did she think about the book. I will start reading her cast offs as I too love to read. Anyway, thanks all. I am in a tough parenting place at this time in the kids lives with their various issues. I want to be good at it.