I think it's pretty cool that today we have internet and a place like P.C. to come to and be with people who will love us through the pain. You stated you were a child and that was a beautiful thing to hear because you are allowing yourself that freedom. I hope you can find people to speak with. A "T," or other people. That unsaid stuff really traps us. I am amazed that you are here and found this place. Keep plugging away. You are not your father. Can you tell us more about you? For example I am an animal lover times a billion. I like the woods and skiing. Who are you inside?