It's a good video. And I was extra pleased with it because much of it I already know for myself, I still liked her presentation of it, and gave me some stuff to ponder.

I would like to add to what Theo says, that it is not so much knowing that we will be hurt (judged, rejected, laughed at, mocked, shrugged off, ignored, etc), but allowing that to be a possible outcome. It is like reaching out to a lost dog that you want to help, you may get bitten or you may get your hand licked, but you don't know. Would you reach out only if you could be 100% sure that you won't get bitten? Then you'll never reach out. Not that it's as easy with our heart. Sheesh, I know. I spent my life in hiding and avoiding.

But back to original question. It's not exactly that we are scared of the vulnerability. We are too scared to be vulnerable. And thinking that we need to be sure of others first is what stands in a way. It is chicken and egg thing. If we do not drop our defenses we will never be able to trust. To me this is where the spiritual aspect comes in. Perhaps we can't trust others, but we can trust God/Higher Self/Universal Love that all that's happening is what should be happening, that the obstacles and stumbling blocks on our path ARE our path, that if we open up and get trodden on that that's what's supposed to be, and that it needs not destroy us. For every story of a person mangled by some horrible life event, there is a story of one to whom that was crux of incredible personal growth. It is not true that if someone betrays us, we will never be able to trust another. We may keep telling ourselves that, but it's a lie. There are lots of shared cultural lies that suck the living out of us.

And are we too scared of ourselves to be true with ourselves? Well, that's probably so. We often do judge ourselves more harshly than we would ever allow anyone else to judge. We demand of ourselves to "be perfect", struggle and constantly punish ourselves for failure, forgetting we already already are perfect. I am perfect me (you would make a very lousy me, btw) and you are perfect you (and I would make an equally lousy you). Why should we try to be someone else, this Perfect Person, whoever she is (except she doesn't exists, she is just another false story spun by our collective mind).