Quote:
Originally Posted by Will
I see vulnerability in a few ways. One experience I had in early childhood, as a vulnerable little one, was to be abused by a parent. The experience was life shaping, as in the worst way. The impact on my brain develop charted a course for self-destruction and distrust latter on in life.
Another experience of vulnerability was trusting the (unknowing at the time) wrong people to care about and respect me as I grew older. Then again I learned to not allow others to draw close to me if fear of being abused yet again.
Currently I am finding the courage of my own capabilities to explore my world around me with an attitude of self-efficiency. This being an ability to allow others in, bit by bit. I found that as I develop a greater worth of self, I become less vulnerable to influences or actions of others that I interact with daily.
One beneficial offshoot of greater self-worth is the ability to discriminate between the helpful and unhelpful people I interact with.
Its a long process for me with progress and digress along the way. To know that I have the power to change my response and control my interaction with the world is greatly grafting. In conclusion, being powerless was debilitating, empowerment is the course for a cure to me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sunna
A vulnerable child, a frail elder, or even a person alone on a dark street that is physical vulnerability. When people are violated it'll affect whole person.
As I understand the original question, and certainly Brene Brown presentation are dealing with emotional vulnerability. People who haven't been abused or violated, and are just scared of rejection or ridicule or some such.
I am very happy for you that you chose to seek ways to heal, and that you are progressing. It is very couragous. And thank you for bringing empowerment to the discussion. It is crucial, isn't it?
I am getting sense that this vulnerability we are after is some sort of warrior vulnerability (warrior of a peaceful kind). Empowered vulnerability?
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I ended up questioning the idea of:
Quote:
Originally Posted by elliemay
IMO vulnerability has everything to do with trusting ourselves, and very little to do with other people.
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I had to developed a sense of "self" to really question what was going on at the time of my abuse.
Quote:
Originally Posted by elliemay
If you trust someone completely (does this even exist?), then you're not really being vulnerable when sharing or being with them, you're just playing in that trust.
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In my early experiences with trust, yes I believed I was vulnerable. As for sharing my trust, I might have been playing. Such early years of being...I'm not sure.
Quote:
Originally Posted by elliemay
I think you build trust by being vulnerable, and intrinsic in that is the knowledge that you will likely be hurt, disappointed or unheard.
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As I started to form trust, vulnerability was natural at the time..me thinks. The knowledge part. I'm not to sure about that part as it relates to my circumstances. I did however get very badly hurt...I can relate to that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by elliemay
You've got to be able to trust yourself and your ability to handle it when those inevitable hurts occur.
That trust in yourself opens the door to trusting others.
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Here's the empowerment part, as I see this. I do have to trust myself as a base to judge the capacity of others to have a somewhat trust in themselves. I also have to evaluate the limits that these others are trustworthy. From there I can move to deeper relationship issues of giving and receiving love.
As all ways topics of vulnerability and such run deep within each individual and their circumstances.
I hope my efforts to further expand on my thoughts with the OP's original post in mind helps you to see my take on the discussion Sunna.
May we all heal in ways that have meaning to each of us
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__________________
Sober Since Aug/29/2022
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