Thread: Memories
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Old Feb 02, 2004, 08:30 PM
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Magnate
 
Member Since: Oct 2003
Location: Chicago
Posts: 2,134
This morning I read the name of a particular drug manufacturer and had some PTSD thoughts relating to my ex-husband and what he did. This happened one time last week, too. The name of the company is such that it reminds me and I remember my ex-husband in a bad way. I wasn't very happy after that. If I let myself focus and obsess in the memories I might have even cried, but it didn't quite come to that. I eventually came out of it, but just writing about it now bothers me a little. I don't know how to even explain moods like this to other people should someone ask. No one did, but it has happened before. I don't know what to say. I usually just keep things short and down to one or two words. Like if someone asks, "What's wrong?", I might answer, "Everything." I don't care if people know, but I don't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable either--which is what seems to happen. People don't know how to respond to other people having "moods". What is the right way to explain, or to be? This morning I would have liked to just walk off the job for a while to be by myself, but that's not one of the best options. I know my boss would be understanding that something was really bothering me emotionally, but I wouldn't know how to explain or validate such a thing as being necessary to walk out to my car or somewhere off the job for a short while. When PTSD is a problem of any severity, mild or severe, how do we know just what is acceptable behavior? I don't want to use PTSD as an excuse. I feel like that makes it feel like a comfort-zone, if you understand. It's not just for at work, but what is acceptable between PTSD and relationships, too? I prefer honesty in any relationship, whether it be work, friends, romantic, whatever, but still the closer you are to someone in whatever the given situation, it seems even more important to be honest and truthful. Friends care and want to be there to help, but they can't help if they don't know or understand what's wrong. Yet some may consider any type of mental illness as reason to stay away from others. It could mean losing a good friend. Having PTSD does complicate things. Makes life more of a challenge at times. I guess that's the purpose of a challenge, though, to make us strive for perfection. I just wish it wasn't so darn frustrating.

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