I did it! I told my husband that I hurt myself last week. I have never told him this stuff before. He knew I did it because of my total breakdown a few years ago but is not aware of how much I do it. I hide it all from him. But I told him. He took it better then I thought he would. He was calm and concerned and asked questions and was so good. It made me feel silly for being so scared to tell him. He still refuses to believe that it is a possibilty that sometime in the future I may have to be hospitalized again. I hope I don't have to be, but the fact is the odds are stacked against me. It doesn't bother me knowing this, in fact accepting this fact makes things so much easier for me because I know that if it gets really bad I have a safe place to go.

Another thing I did was talked to my manager about what happened last week (no details, just that I had "an episode" that scared me) and asked her if it would be ok for me to teach my co-worker how to do the books just in case something happened. Luckily I work in a safe place and am able to be honest about my weaknesses. It feels good having a back up plan so that if I do have to go to the hospital I won't have to worry about my job or leaving my store in the lurch.

Funny how much healthier I feel. Here I am going around making plans for in case I have a break down and it is making me feel so good. I guess it must be because I am no longer alone with this.
Carrie