You are such an intelligent person. You have not ruined your life, but I bet the pain of being lonley and having people around you not understand why you like to play the games is hard. In addition, having people make fun of you for playing the games is very cruel. There are people who will understand you. In fact, maybe this situation will give you a sensitivity to others who also feel lonley. -- and in the end make you turn out to be a stronger adult. Take a look around you and see if you can find an adult who will be kind and supportive of you and maybe you can strike up a relationship there.

Good luck!