where I am today.

I feel so down. I feel like a fish-out-of-water at work. I was recently hired and worked very hard to fill in for someone who had just quit. Then that person came back and now they want to relagate me to 10 hours a week. It's no surprise, it's a little more along the lines of what I signed up for. I just thought they would recognize that I had really helped them out when they needed it. But, to be honest, I just never understand the office environment. I try to act like the others, and pretend to be energetic. Some days it's easier. Some days it is all I can do to keep from crying. I feel confused by people and strongly dislike others (in authoritative positions) telling me what to do. I get so triggered by that that I cringe. But I put up with it because that's what work is; having other people telling you what to do.
I have had a lump in my throat and stomach since I woke up this morning. All I want to do is cry, to disappear. But I have pushed through the day.

Then the last thing that happened was my watch broke. It's a new watch. I got it last year and I love it. I dropped it and the glass face broke. It was just the last disappointment in a sad day. I wrote the company to see if I could fix it or replace it. Who knows if I'll ever hear back. It was my own fault. I just feel so sad.