Thank you both so very much. What you both say makes total sense. I have apologized many times...as my fears have already hurt our relationship (to a certain extent). Yes, she does know about my past, and has helped me to confront some of the unresolved issues that I had with it. Rapsody...you are soo correct. I've ID'd these feelings, I know where they come from...but I have not totally "buried" them yet. I need to put them in behind me.....and let them alone. I know that my wife is the most wonderful peson in the world and she would do anything for me. She wants to be my best friend, and I want to be hers...but when my fears take control....I hurt her...and then she pulls away (which I don't blame her for doing it). It is a very vicious cycle that I'm ready to break. We have talked about my insecurities and she does understand...but it still hurts her when I lash out. She doesn't deserve to be judged on what someone else has done to me....and I want to fix this.

Thanks to you both!!!!