@ new2 ar & @ leed thanks for your kind words. i completely feel for the sufferings that u have gone thru. i was hurt beyond what i thought i would ever stand . before marrigae i would never take any nonsense from any man or woman. if it wasnt justice i would raise avoice. then after the supression began i sort of lost my mind. he hit me verbally and physically threatening me with dire consequences to me, my dignity in public and my parents. somedays i would vehemently resist the insensitivity he showed towards me ( including demanding i massaged his body aching from drving at break neck speeds in traffic)that it ended up in fights including pinning me to the bed and flinging me across rooms. he had already spread word among neigbours that i screamed and raised my voice for the least frustration so they would never check up. i am glad to be out of all that atleast now i can breath in peace. not anymore, never again. these words got me out. and the conviction that i tried everything that is humanly possible and possible by me to save that marriage is what stands behind me in the journey of getting rid of that man, his beliefs, and memories banished away into oblivion. i want to go to a professional to speak things out but cant afford them. so this forum will do giving me the encouragement and courage to go on day to day.i am now taking each day trying to meet new people and at first trying to pretend being comfortable then slowly progressing to actual comfort. i now realise i can shed my earlier notions that people are trying to judge and hurt you and can begin to trust some people i feel are capable of being genuine persons. evryday is a new day...i want to keep my head up all the time which was a difficulty when i first came away. god is helping me thru....
good for you for handling your situations well. kudos and hugs too. thanks again.
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