Yes, Kitty. I didn't realize it until I started therapy. I didn't have a "normal" childhood and so how could I, or anyone else in the same situation, know what "normal" is? It's actually a relative term. We all have our own sense of normal: opening gifts Christmas Eve vs Christmas morning, eating breakfast vs not - know what I mean/

I always felt lost when trying to relate and raise the kids. Of course, most of that time I was in Protector mode and lived most of my life with anhedonia without knowing it (funny how much a "label" can explain). I always felt bad about missing so much because I couldn't and never had myself experienced it. Sorry, I'm bumming myself, and proboblly others, out. (Edit if you need to. I understand.)

In the short, yah, I know what you mean. You're not alone.
Anne