her pride is getting in the way, my mother did the same to me not acknowledge the extent of what I did for her...just be careful it does not become co dependant, then it just gets ugly.....you need help/respite.

it is this time in your life when you should be starting to build a life of your own dating, thinking about career, kids, this is why regular respite is important....you need to find someone who is able to give you periodic breaks regularly enough so that you do have a life of your own that when and if she is in hospital you have something to do other than clean the house up again.....you do not exist for your mother you are your own person and it is now that is the time to start to make that move to begin building it.....even if it is just making some friends to have coffee with once a week.

oh sorry missed the engagement part, that is awesome! it may be worth investigating carer services with the local council. although an alternative would be that you can look for a house just for you and your husband....and maybe get a granny flat or unit for her nearby for her to be able to ask for help when needed.