Hi, niko, and welcome! No, you are not alone. We're here and we're listening.

I had continual panic and it's disabling. I, too, did the med route for years. I, too, had a physical condition.

What helped me was biofeedback therapy and one on one psychotherapy. The meds were getting me nowhere. After the biofeedback, and several months of therapy, I was able to go off the xanax and antidepressants even...after years. I did keep it in the cabinet, just in case, for about six months then was able to throw them out.

It IS possible to get past this. We literally had to trick my brain into not having the panic that it was so used to acting on.

I know how it feels, and I'm sorry you're dealing with this for so long now. There is hope. Hang on.

Please, please go to your local community mental health center and speak with someone ASAP.

Don't hesitate to PM as well.

I'm glad you found us.

kd