@ Visioneer: I definitely HAVE felt guilty about everything that happened. You are right. I often think about how I may have brought the treatment onto myself by putting up with it. And there WAS a part of me that was trying to see the good in him.

I guess I also can't fathom how someone could be so cold, and discard without another thought (until they need attention/sex again).

I also recognize that I have a codependent personality, and I'm going to be looking for help as soon as I get myself established in this new area.
Thank you for the reassurance, as I've been turning this over and over in my head. I've come away feeling like this has all been my fault for not walking away a long time ago (he tells me that I've treated MYSELF like *****, and that he hasn't done anything wrong. I believed that at first). Thank you guys.

Oh, and sorry about the last post from me. For some reason, I couldn't see that anyone had posted anything at all.