When I reread my post I basically put into words pretty much what my therapist explained to me in my meeting with him on Tuesday.

But he added something to it. He told me that most of the things we experience from day to day we process at night in rem sleep and they are not necessarily significant and we may not always remember each and everything we experience every day.

But when someone experiences trauma, any kind of trauma the brain is really caught off guard and the normal processing doesn't take place for some reason. And that is pretty much what I try to describe myself. And that unprocessed memory, because it involved so many sudden moments that involved a type of attack that experience can easily come forward as an unresolved issue. And it can happen years after it had occured.

My therapist talked about me trying EMDR treatment where I am to relax and let my mind wander while he makes my eyes follow his finger to simulate rapid eye movement in sleep. He told me that somehow this process allows the brain to finally process the memory better and the person eventually feels much better. And he told me that it has worked for all his patients. But it does create anxiety and emotions and even feeling very tired and drained. But that eventually leaves and the patients say they feel amazingly better.

I am at the point where, why not? If I can process years of troubled memories that are somehow all coming forward with my current issue I would like to just feel better.

I did ask if anyone else here had the treatment, he asked me to present the question but I have had no one come forward. Maybe they have left because they feel better. I do recall in my early days here some talk of that therapy.

I guess I might be the guinea pig for everyone here. I am not sure when I am going to start as it takes longer sessions. But I am ready to try anything at this point.

So I will keep you posted when that time comes.

Open Eyes