It's not possible to control other people, "make" them like/love us and some people we like "looking at" and some people like us but we don't them. If you are not close to your sensei, then you don't really know her so your desire to be close to her is coming wholly from you, that's why I put "looking at" in quotes; it's like when we read a book and use our imagination to make it come alive for us.

However, you have gotten to know your friend a little bit and now you are finding there are some things you don't care for about her character. That's okay, no one is perfect! But make sure that some of finding fault with another is not just jealousy? It is hard when someone else has what we think we want.

I would look at why you are enamored with a woman almost twice your age? When I was a teen and "loved" my teachers, it was because I had trouble relating to my own mother. Trying to get from another what we don't get from our mother's can set up problems for us in real life. I would examine your life, what you want for yourself (not in relation to others) and how you want yourself to be and start working on that. Eventually, what our parents did/did not do in raising us is not very important as we are "grown" and adults and have to take over, wherever we are, doing the best we can with ourselves, molding ourselves and our characters into what we think would make a good person of our type.

Work as hard on your real life as you do on your fantasies and you will be very successful. It sounds like you have a good imagination, use it for you instead of for escaping into LOTRs? Clean up your room, not because your father says so but because you want to be a disciplined, neat, clean person? The more you work hard toward understanding and becoming yourself, the less your father will be able to criticize and the less you will "hear" his criticism as that if you are being true to yourself.