Sleeps, I really want to know what is going on with more detail. Can you p.m. me? I am sorry you are hurting so much. When I was a kid I used to pray, to who I don't know, that my dog, me and her puppies would all die so no one could suffer the loss of the other. She was a dog made to breed everytime she came into season and there were many puppies. Magical thinking, may we all die by the great spirits hand in our sleep. Please let me in on what is going on inside. You have been my friend. That is worth more then gold.