Yeah I get like this too, part of me loves joking around but I always wonder if that's what people really mean!! My brain won't shut up!! I suppose therapy is the one place where you really need to say those things out loud for it to work, though. Maybe you could ask if that is what he meant.

Timely post! My T made a comment last week that was helpful at the time "you don't need to make a parade about it unles you want to" and I went down the road of turning it back on me and obessing about it. Familiar problem!

What was new this time was that for whatever reason I was able to say to myself "Hmmm that wasn't the spirit she meant that in. You can take it that way if you want but will it be helpful?" So it can change.. I think the awareness that you are "using T's word against you" is a great start!

He never teases me, and he always looked so hurt when I teased him, I think he has broken me of this unconscious habit, now that you mention it. Do I use that word (unconscious) wrong?

P.S. I am totally psyched out right now by that whole comment about my whole, sensitivity holding me back in life comment from T. It is like poison in my brain right now, I don't know how else to describe it. It is really not helping. I should be so excited about going on a second date with a nice guy tomorrow.. really, really nice.. right now my brain is tearing itself to bits trying to figure out how if I am somehow too judgmental, or too quiet, or in fact too sensitive and am somehow going to screw it up.

Add: yes I am very sensitive to abandonment, always want to know what went wrong and if it was my fault, guess that kind of proves T's point.