Are you getting help yourself? That is something you yourself can do, get good help and therapy. Eventually maybe you and your husband can go in for marriage therapy, maybe he will eventually get the help he needs individually. But ultimately the person for you to focus on is yourself.

You can be a good role model for him by you taking good care of yourself. Get good support, set some healthy boundaries, enjoy your life. If you are in an unsafe situation please get help and safety right away.