Hi moviebuff,
I am a stay at home stepmom of an 11 year old girl. I go through the same things. I constantly get on her to brush her teeth, but if i don't , she will not do it on her own. My husband and I have started taking away snacks when she forgets. She loves her food! It's a constant battle with her for everything. This year, I have my husband at home to help me, so I try to put it on him, since it is HIS daughter. Last year, I was so nasty and loud while my husband was at work, I could just imagine what the neighbors thought! I never had control over myself. I threw her wagon off the front porch once. Boy, did I feel like a jerk afterwards.I did alot of crazy stuff. Therapy and meds helped! I'm bipolar though. But we do it because we care, and want them to be perfect kids. But they are just kids. We need to chill out and let them be kids. I decided I am going to be the fun stepmom instead of the mean old wicked stepmother that I am. Her real mom don't give a crap. So, let her dad do the disciplining, and i will have fun with her, cuz right now I'm the only one who cares, and she's not even my kid. Go figure.