God used to get me through everything when i was younger. Then around my senior year a neighbor who i knew my whole life, drown in the ocean on vacation trying to save a little boy who was drowning when lifeguards were off duty. When i heard the news i guess i couldnt understand why God would let this happen. Anyway since then i finally got very spiritual again (through mania). But after i started meds i lost God again. I understand that its me who is lost, i guess i am asking for advice on getting found. Thank you in advance.