Hello there.
I totally hear you. I've been in that place before. It's called depression. Your meds are still getting the a therapeutic level and you need to cut yourself some slack.

I feel exactly the same way with my relationships. I lean on people because I really do need them, and looking back, I feel embarrassed that I needed them so much. Some friends I've pushed away through this. But in hindsight, they probably didn't care. The real friends, are still there for me.
And when I feel stable, I give it 110% to be the best possible friend in return.

Hugs my friend-your friends care for you, and know that you only ask for what you need. That's what friendships are about