You are NOT a prude. Your husband is treating you in a horribly degrading manner, and he needs to get himself under control. How dare he do that to you when you're looking for your daughter's toy! The act isn't about sex, he knows you don't like it. I refuse to believe that the man could be so STUPID that he can't understand what you've said. He's actually doing it, not out of affection, but as a gesture of ownership. It's a control issue, he's saying that your privates don't belong to you, they belong to him. How would he like it if you kept grabbing his crotch when he was doing regular stuff, mowing the lawn, for example, or washing the car.

He has to stop this, because though the act itself isn't wrong (some women would like it, or be flattered) his intention isn't to please you, it's to tell you that nothing you have is yours. And he'd better get out of this habit before your daughter sees him at it.

I had an abusive husband (first husband) and it destroyed my sexual confidence for years. It is simply not right to do something, anything, sexual when you know your partner doesn't like it. Unfortunately, because you're a woman, you can't reciprocate in kind and grab his nuts, tempting though it may be, because if he's the kind of man I think he is from his actions, he'd probably hit you.

My advice, if he hits you, move out. And I'm so sorry you've got to put up with this crap.