im really sorry to hear that your haveing a bad time jazz, do you have ins is that why she wont see you ?sorrry if i didnt get that part ! i have been threw a few doc & they all were no good it took me 4yrs to find a good one ,just keep trying atleast you have this websight to go to i didnt im shure it would have been a great resourse depression is a very bad thing ive been there alot lately i hope you hang in there i beleave someone is out there waiting to help you it seems they way things work is when you just absalutly cant take anymore & you have no motivation to do anything such as taking a shower its important that you try to do that i learned that it makes alittle bit of a differance but when you least expect it something will come your way i beleave that ,iv been in really dark places were i didnt see the light at the end of the tunnel ya just gotta keep going for me it was this web sight my son found it for me it was a life altering experance for me not knowing how to work a computer & that was just a few weeks ago ,you will be in my prayers ,i beleave in you by hearing your story your not giveing up you reached out,so that tells me you do care & your a fighter you can do it !good luck i really hope things turn around for you ! everyone deserves a second chance or as many chances as it takes !
good luck moon !