Quote:
Originally Posted by estimated prophet
God used to get me through everything when i was younger. Then around my senior year a neighbor who i knew my whole life, drown in the ocean on vacation trying to save a little boy who was drowning when lifeguards were off duty. When i heard the news i guess i couldnt understand why God would let this happen. Anyway since then i finally got very spiritual again (through mania). But after i started meds i lost God again. I understand that its me who is lost, i guess i am asking for advice on getting found. Thank you in advance.
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I guess I'm in the same boat; I have often looked at my life and all I'm going through and wondered "Why me?" I watched my faith get destroyed by a voice in my head and a bunch of religious people who are proof that "the road to hell is paved with good intentions". I think that, for me, the simple asking and searching for God is proof that I still have some faith, even if I have a lot of anger to go with it. I am still searching, hoping to find my answers, but I also realize that the journey of the search matters just as much (if not more) than the destination, even if none of the questions are answered in the end.
I'm sorry you're going through all of this, and I wish I could offer you something more than my answer. Everyone seems to experience or have experienced a "dark night of the soul" where all you can do is press forward and hope there is a light at the end of the tunnel, even if you can't see it. Just know that you're not alone.