I havn't cut in maybe a month more or less and I had a dream last night where I cut myself very vividly on my SH arm and I saw the cuts. When I woke up I had the urge to self harm. Not out of anger or sadness but of anxiety, of not cutting, of that feeling of relief from the anxiety. I was anxious to cut, I was anxious not to cut, I was anxious. I wanted to cut to relieve that feeling and it still hasnt gone away almost a day later. I was talking to someone who really calms me down but they've fallen alseep and the anxiety is back. I amost told him about it but I chickened out. I know he can help me but its like I almost want to.

So I wouldn't I drew a butterfly over top of my scars but Im getting shaky and really anxious and I don't know what to do...... help.