My son is on the autistic spectrum, and so, according to my psydoc, am I. (What a combination, schizoaffective aspie!) He didn't walk until he was about two, and even then he was wobbly, he's never learned to ride a bike, he still has trouble doing his shoes up (he's fifteen by the way) and I've seen him fall over on his back while trying to kick a ball. He's even laughed himself at his physical ineptness. He once swung with a bat to hit a ball during PE... and managed to whack himself in the face with, of all things, the ball. He asked, how does anyone bat a ball directly into their own face? He says it's like an inverse superpower.

He was a late talker, but an early reader. He read from books before he was forming independant sentences. (He could read Mr Men when he was three, but if he wanted anything he'd sign for it.) At one stage he had his own language that he'd invented. I was worried he'd never learn to speak English. Then, suddenly, he started in sentences... and as you describe with your own son, he said some incredibly funny things. (Have you had the radiant and embarassing honesty bit yet? My son once said to a breast feeding woman, "you have a beautiful baby... and fantastic breasts!")

Our children are beautiful. They develop along their own path, and often times they can be very surprising. My son has turned out, suddenly, to be a musician. Just over a year and a half ago he started playing the piano, and now he's playing sonatas and fugues etc by Beethoven, Bach, Handel... He's started playing the violin, and is also learning the guitar. The school pay for about half of his music lessons, which is pretty fantastic if you ask me. Considering that he still falls over sometimes when he's walking (his dyspraxia is pretty bad) everyone's amazed with how precise and subtle he can be using his hands while playing an instrument. That's autistic hyper focusing perfectionism for you... in one area he's defeated the dyspraxia. Our kids can over come anything (that's one benefit you might find with video games, though you need to keep an eye on it, and set a timer, or they'll never come off it.)

You'll probably find that your boy will obsess about something which utterly bores you. With my son it's superheroes and video games. But he finally found a constructive obsession, hence his rapid advancement musically. Just let your son grow the way he grows, be glad about it, he's unique, and you can be proud of him. Often times I think autism isn't a disorder, it's a difference. More profoundly autistic people might be harder to communicate with, but they are often happy when treated with respect. I don't know where your son is on the spectrum, but he's verbal, he's happy, and he's yours. Don't feel ashamed or guilty... I honestly believe the world needs quirky nerds. Imagine if the autistic Isaac Newton or Albert Einstein had not had their obsessions? Do a google of famous autistics, you'll be amazed how much the world has been improved by the autie gene.

Like you I grieved when I first found out... then I suddenly thought, he's still himself, the exact same way he was yesterday, good, intense, clever, quirky and kind. We can be proud of our sons.