{{{ gma }}} you might look into cognitive therapy, changing the way you view yourself and the world around you, events and expectations... i used to joke that panic attacks were my form of aerobic exercise,, the docs didn't laugh, but i felt better... i used to have this way of thinking that i called catastrophic ideation: always imagining the worst. it's a defense mechanism that is so burdensome, better to be vulnerable and free of it, as i am now. hope you find the support you need... best wishes,, Gus