Overall, I agree with the others who suggested that the scripted sessions seem to be an attempt to keep walls up, sort of maintain control.
Part of the control is to assure that I maximize benefit from the session. It's my paid 50 minutes and I want there to be some noticeable advance in my growth.

On the other hand, you seem to want your therapist to assume some control as well. It's almost as though you're afraid to let it go, for fear of losing something. Yes, I also want her to take control and she has done that a few times and when she does that it seems like we go much deeper. But other times we've floundered when I let loose the reins.

Ah ambivalence. I guess if I had to choose I would prefer that she completely take charge and lead me where I should go but therapy is about learning how to take care of yourself so ambivalence is built into the exercise.

I've said it before and I will say it again, I'm an advocate of the blurt and in so many situations. By saying whatever seems ready to bubble out at the time, my therapy has vaulted forward on occasion. Luckily I have been able to express my feelings honestly to her in the moment. I try very hard to be honest and let me tell you, that is not the easiest thing to do - especially with the rupture we've had.

Other times we've ended up talking about lions or something. It's all good fodder I guess.I guess...