Caroline is right...you are going to see it as your fault, the whole thing, but it's not. You realize where you went wrong, and that's good. Time to say 'I'm not gonna do it again' and stand your ground. I have this exercise..really small, but it helps: I write down things that I'm good at, things that make me happy, etc. I do this every day, even though I can't see things that way right now. Other people can't see the faults that you see in yourself, and they won't understand how you feel unless you talk about it. Keep talking, keep writing...you're not alone! *hugs*