Quote:
Originally Posted by MikoNoShikon
I am not sure why you haven't brought this to her attention. If you feel very strongly about the sister finding 'play dates' for your husband then go talk to her. The comment made me concerned. You said your husband/partner has AS but it is undiagnosed. You should take him to get him checked out, it would make both your lives a lot easier. On top of that, you need to learn that sometimes people want a break from 'couple' things. You originally said 30yr olds and then 20 year olds at the end, I am not sure the age of these new neighbors, but guys tend to bond over odd things no matter the age. You need to take some time for yourself. If you husband is happy going out once or twice to hang out with his sister then you should chill out. He isn't cheating on you, and your yelling is not helping. She was his sister before you were his wife and there are some things you will never fully understand. You are being a bit unreasonable. You want to do couple things, find a nice couple yourself.
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Thanks...I find the situation as no less then her meddling and him being too passive to say anything about the situation. She is very controlling, and when she says jump he does. He gets upset when she insists he does things and then will not confront her as he is scared of what she will say & what she will do, this is the pattern of their relationship..so now we have this incident whereas he feels its fine about her suggesting this. They are not that close and he can only spend so much time with her before he loses his tolerance..as most of her family also complains about her as well.. I dont feel it natural and that is what bugs me..if those guys just happened to be outside or at her house I could see it as normal..however she got their phone number,,called her brother over, and then called them to ask if he could drop by...Im sorry but that whole thing to me is weird..which is why Ive referred to it as a playdate..
We do have couple friends and its irritating that she feels the need to do anything that would have him pulling away from me instead if bonding more with our family. I dont care if he has friends..he chooses not too.. I find it plainly weird that she is insisting on this, he is a grown man and if this is what he wanted..then he would have it..how many 50 odd yr old sisters find friends so their 42 yr old brother can hang with...she should be encouraging his life with his family, and if he needs a male friend, then he has plenty of opportunity to find one himself as he works in a very social setting that allows him to meet ppl of many shapes and sizes every day..Ive encouraged him to get in touch with his other male friends, he goes out after work at times and has drinks without me, and its not like I do not want him to have any..
The two guys are renting a townhouse in our complex, and are in their 20's- or 30's he said. Now I know Ill get screamed at for this but we all know what 30 something unattached males look for..and no this isnt all, howsoever in general they party, get laid and then spent the rest of their time wishing they were getting laid..IMO..I know this is generalizing, however Ive been there did that and now this is grown up time, not time to revert back to the good old single days..
I do not wish to approach her, as she is also a black and white thinker, and then this private issue would then include his whole family as it gets tossed about possibly changing as it goes and leaving me as the bad spouse etc etc etc...
I wanted to rant as this is not normal to me..and bugs the hell out of me.