Well that can be true Michael, some people do ask to be soothed by lies. And there are those who are good at lieing to sooth others in order to either gain social standing, or something they need for themselves. And there are people who's sole purpose is to disable another person into self doubt and a sense of worthlessness, hense Bullies and other Abusers.

However if you are someone that speaks the truth, you may be one who is kept away from a group of individuals that only wish to play around the truth and play constant games of subtle deception amongst themselves. And the truth teller is only approached when the subtle games reveal something that truely has to be addressed. The truth teller can be used to call out something that is troublesome to the players in the group, something is called out and addressed by the truth teller and that truth teller is then pushed aside and the games continue.

Unfortunately we live in a world where there are all kinds of lies that are practiced and supported everywhere. It can even seem as though the only gain is in learning how to lie and deceive the best one can so that gains can not only be made but sustained.

So when someone says that " they are no good at this," "Am I too much of a push over", "Could I have done that differently", they are not necessarily asking to be lied to, they actually want to know the truth. And when they get an answer that says "yes", the truth is that your not a bad person, you never learned how to deal with the various aspects of the pitfalls of human nature, they become relieved at finally hearing the truth.

So the struggle begins at learning how to accept the truth and also how to deal with it in a stronger healthier manner. And some people can only deal with the truth a little at a time because they were only allowed to live in a life of lies and deception.
And there are many different ways a person can be caught in deception, some of those ways are self deception, but a self deception that one may not truely be aware of.

The one that is the perceived ***hole is the one who truely cannot see the honest struggle of others. This person who is so lacking of empathy can identify the weakness only as they may be a good deceiver or can quickly define deception out of watching and learning how it is dealt with and overcome. And the ***hole is one who just assumes that defining deception is so blatently obvious the person who asks the troubling questions is stupid and does not want to hear the truth.

IN REALITY:
In both cases, it may not be "FAIR" to define the true ***hole. Because there is a genuine lack in both. The only one that can truely answer the original question is one who knows the truth, and has enough "empathy" to see another person doesn't truely understand and will take the time to explain it on a level where that person can gain some "True insight that will give them the opportunity to not only accept the truth but to learn how to see it better and apply it to their own personal growth." If someone does not possess "empathy" it is not always their fault, that person just cannot truely understand the way to view certain questions.

Open Eyes