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Originally Posted by SoupDragon
Yes I can see that the word "unbearable" is significant and why this can lead to a coping mechanism of switching off those "unbearable" feelings - but is it the event that is therefore unbearable, or our feelings in response to the event, or are these one and the same?
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Good distinction!
Quote:
Originally Posted by SoupDragon
Also if two people are exposed to the same event, the outcome for them in terms of thoughts / feelings may be different - (although neither would find the event pleasant) are these differences therefore due to "nature", previous experiences?
So is the reason I am seeing T, not specifically because of traumatic events, but because I didn't have the capacity to deal with them. which is about me as a person?
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I believe that previous developmental successes help a person to weather future traumas. I also believe that temperment is important. I have one daughter who is very sensitive and one who is tough as nails. My tough daughter could weather any situation. My very sensitive daughter would be traumatized at a very, very much lower threshold. I see it with my eyes everyday how they each respond to various situations. None of these situations makes the person who suffers more from trauma bad, absolutely not. We are all different. Very sensitive people are very, very valuable. Very sensitive people give us great beauty in this world. Our world would not be as wonderful without them.
So, going back to your first question up there ^ - I think that it is the feelings that are generated which make it unbearable. People who train to be navy seals can take a lot and this is because they are well trained and they don't generate the feelings to bad situations.