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My youngest son went off to Marine boot camp on the first. We both knew that there would be a culture shock. I grew up in an abusive home so I never ever wanted my children to feel that they were worthless, helpless or powerless. Unfortunately that is a very large part of phase one of boot camp. He went in with his eyes open. It is one thing to hear about what is going to happen and another thing entirely to live it.
Today we FINALLY got our first letters. Enclosed in one envelope was a joint letter to my husband and I, one for his older brother and one for his twin. In the second envelope there was one for me, one for hubby, and one for his twin.
With my older two children I was their favorite person in the world growing up. I was their mother; that was as it should be. It was sometimes difficult raising children where I knew I was number two from day one. My twins have been closest to each other then anyone else in the world. From the cradle the nurtured, soothed, supported, and entertained each other. It was such an amazing thing to witness that I did not feel slighted most of the time. In their teens it was a problem because they did not have to come to me or their father with their problems, they had each other.
When I opened the letter I started reading the twin’s letter first by accident, stopped immediately and found my letter. I knew it was coming. I knew how he was going to feel, I tried to prepare him but it did not make it any easier to read. He did not go into detail, just made a couple of comments and asked if we would still be proud of him if he did not make it. I immediately wrote him another letter full of support and encouragement. Then I read my next letter. It was slightly better, but still so depressing. As I said, I knew this letter was coming. My brother is a Marine and he has been wonderfully supportive and warned me what was to come. The websites suggested in the brochures told me they all felt this way and it was part of the process.
I texted the twin at work to find out when he was going to break. I waited three and a half hours. I just couldn’t stand not knowing. I knew if the recruit was going to be straight with anyone it would be his twin, I had to know how he was really doing. I read the twin’s letters. I broke a trust I swore to myself I would never break.
As soon as I finished reading the rest of the letters my son text me. Apparently a friend of the twin’s saw my FB status about getting the letters and the twin texted me to see if he had gotten one. I told him yes he got two and confessed to reading them. He is so angry at me and I do not blame him one bit!
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I've been married for 24 years and have four wonderful children.
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