I think I had to look at my depression as a medical problem. I suffered from major depressive episodes off and on since the age of 10. I had been in and out of mental hospitals since I was 15. I have now been on 6 different antidepressants. I had gotten to the point where I thought that I didn't need medication. That my problems are all psychological and an effect of my childhood. But now I understand my depression. I can see the patterns of how I decline. I had to come to terms that this is not a personality fault of mine, but the biological/ medical problem that it is.

Have to look at it as genes as well. You said your aunt suffered from depression. My grandmother was bipolar and I have an aunt and cousin who are both schizophrenics. So I see where my genes factor into my depression. After I understood that it's alright to be depressed and I did nothing wrong that's when I was able to accept it. Now I know when I get depressed. Kind of learned over the years that when I get to a point where I'm not able to function in my job or home life that I need to be medicatied. I'm able to go to my general doc and say I need to be on medication again. I normally stay on my med for a year or so and I then tend to do fairly well for a few years before I need a medication again.

I think you just have to look at everything going on in your life and see how things are suffering from your depression. I've been amazed after restarting a med about how I let things go down hill. My work had really suffered. I'm still playing catch up for the months I was depressed.

Monty