Dont get me wrong Rainbow, i want/need someone in my life who i can go
to, to share my thoughts and behaviours with...and i do, my T!

I have felt close to one particular T (ive had 3 previous & currently have a
key-worker & a new T) and thats becoz she disclosed alot of her personal
info to me. We had a very similar upbringing and MH. When our sessions
came to an end it was like the end of an era, but thats how it is... She
refered me to an addiction centre. But thats the process of recovery. Also
becoz we share so much personal stuff with out Ts, its natural we are
going to feel like that, isnt it? We dont go discussing some of the things
we do with out Ts to others and for that reason thats why i believe she is
"just a T" and its what Ts are there for. The feelings are there coz we are
able to open up to our Ts about our MH and be open and honest about it.
Where as family, friends etc. we hold back stuff, if even at all open up
about it.

I did with the T who i became close to, i thought, "yeah i could go for
drinks with her and have a laugh", but i know why i felt this way. i felt this
way coz we were similar people and had been thru much the same (as far
as i know from what she told me).....duno if she felt the same way tho. I
did search her on facebook, but i would do that with anyone who i was
close with.

I suppose its just a question i have never really thought about - What is a
T?

The way i see it is, she is someone to listen to me, guide me, etc. and
nothing else, even tho i may feel like i "need" her in my life, Ts come and
go and that is life. I understand that relationships form and we become
comfortable and can come to "love" them being there, but the difference
maybe that i reconise it for what it is and try to leave feelings out of the
relationship and that is - my recovery

I have just begun a new thearpy and who knows how ill feel towards her.
But my main aim is my recovery...

Maybe im in denial!!!!!!!!!!!!! If thats even possible!