I feel like it means that I'm moving towards healing...towards the sunlight and the big sky.

Last year, when we got very close to this topic and then I lost it and we stopped talking about it, I had the first dream...with a messy, dark basement, lots of rooms, kind of scary. The door had one window. This year, moving THROUGH the topic, the basement is vast and almost EMPTY, with just one more room to finish dealing with...and the doors are french doors, ALL windows to the outside.

It kind of gives me goosebumps. I feel like I am really, really getting through this. Like I'm going to make it. I'm emptying out all of that buried stuff from the past, and leaving open space for something new.

T sent me an e-mail this week and said "keep swimming, the shore isn't far". Maybe he's right.

I guess it makes me feel hopeful.