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Old Aug 27, 2011, 06:25 AM
Anonymous33005
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So in the last month I've

Gotten a full time job at a great company that has me in training for the past month learning something completely new and required total concentration.

Left my abusive husband 3 weeks later and am in my own apartment now- definitely the hardest thing i've ever had to do.

Experienced an earthquake while at my new job - it wasn't a bad one but i definitely had some chest pains.



Waiting for a hurricane to hit that they are actually closing highways down for -and have been evacuating the coast. I don't live by the coast and I'm not really sure whether or not it's going to be that bad but the gas station was out of gas yesterday - the stores are out of bottled water and flashlights....it's total hysteria here in my state.



And I have not smoked a cigarette through all of this. I am a week and a half away from one year of quitting but Holy YOU KNOW WHAT!!!!
And i don't drink anymore because it gives me headaches.

i have a panic attack daily at 4pm and start crying. I sit close enough to the ladies room so I can run in for a few while my Ativan kicks in.
I cry a few times a day...I know it's to be expected...i did just have all these major life changes.

But I can't sit still when i get 'home"...it's kind of new to be calling it home. I have been cleaning incessantly...walking around....I unpacked immediately when I moved in so i really don't have too much to do here. It's taking every ounce of strength in me not to go haywire shopping for stuff but I really need the money so I can pay all of my bills on my own. And i'm barely eating or sleeping - I sleep from 11:30pm to 4:30....try to lie in bed till 6 - good thing is that i'm exercising regularly....and i take Ambien and Xanax every night....and i'm just not very hungry.

To me all of this sounds like hypomania, but i think I need to get other opinions to solidify it in my head. I'm BPII and have only had a few hypomanic phases.

I see my T this week - I hadn't moved when I saw my Pdoc last to tell her these things....and that's the other thing - i'm going to have to switch both T and Pdoc now that i've moved...I just really hope nothing else stressful happens like a long and drawn out power outage to send me over the edge.