((((( ev )))))

I was the same way. I would sit there and say "I'm fine thank you" then go home and fall to pieces.

I think mine was "conditioning." Trying all my life to convince myself I really was fine, I tried to convince her too.

AND trust is a huge issue for me. I would write in my journal and hand it to her then sit in silence the whole session while she read it.

She recently noted that I was sitting all the way back on the sofa. I have been perched on the edge, feet firmly planted on the floor, turned towards the door and ready to bolt for nine years.

I guess I'm starting to relax a little.