chant, welcome to pc.  staying away from people, places and things that you associate with drinking is a good start. not sure if you are a problem drinker or alcoholic but my suggestion may help you. i find that those who even question themselves usually have to consider abstaining from alcohol.
here's good info for you:
Quote:
Alcohol Dependence...Dependence upon alcohol or a specific substance (such as cocaine, nicotine, marijuana, etc.) is characterized by a maladaptive pattern of alcohol or substance use, leading to clinically significant impairment or distress, as manifested by 3 or more of the following, occurring at any time in the same 12-month period:
Tolerance, as defined by either of the following:
A need for markedly increased amounts of the alcohol or substance to achieve intoxication or desired effect.http://psychcentral.com/disorders/sx16.htm
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Quote:
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In the contemplation stage, often with the help of a treatment professional, people make a risk-reward analysis. They consider the pros and cons of their behavior, and the pros and cons of change. They think about the previous attempts they have made to stop drinking, and what has caused failure in the past.http://psychcentral.com/lib/2006/stages-of-change/
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And one about alcoholism
http://psychcentral.com/disorders/sx15.htm
hope these articles help you.
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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