sketch
i hate being on meds. i fought being on them for many years. i thought i could handle my illness on my own. for years i tried all kinds of strategies to manage my moods, but i just kept getting sicker. like from anxiety, suicidal depressions and mania to adding voices in my head and other symptoms of psychosis to a full blown breakdown. i reached a point where i knew that it was go on meds or die. i always thought of going on meds meant i was weak for not being able to handle it on my own. but this is a chemical thing in my brain. how can i possibly fight tht? i couldnt. it took a couple years but i am finally stabilized. i dream of getting off meds one day and talk lots about it with T who is not a big fan of meds but does enforce with me that i do need them. i am scared to get off of them. i was really really sick. i am afraid of going back there. so i do take my meds.