Sounds like you need a referee.
You blowing up and yelling at him does not help.
Him blaming you for hurting his feelings, is him not taking responsibility for his feelings. That and him hitting his head makes me wonder how he believes himself to be "good at communication". I mean, he is good at expressing his anger, yeah, but that's not communication.
If both of you read a book and both of you agreed on doing the communication exercises, exactly like these books say to do them, maybe... but really, I would suggest find a couples counselor to at least get you on the right path.