I'm sorry you're so tired Costello, it's really hard when you end up looking after everyone but yourself.

I hear what you're saying about being your son's only lifeline. Before I was diagnosed my only life line was my husband... then he died. I distrusted my family, because for years I'd felt they were judging me for my failures (professional and social... I felt they wanted me to achieve and have their kind of social lives. Probably a little bit true, actually.)

Then there was a time when I started relying more on my son than was healthy for him at his age. It took about a year for the meds and social support put in place by my treatment team to help me find other lifelines. I'm now involved in a church which offers support, and I'd say in the last month rallied so well they kept me out of hospital. Not everyone is so lucky though.

Does your son have a treatment team? In the UK we have a "short term crises team" who are with you for six months and work very hard to stabilise you... at the end of six months they can renew if necessary. If a year or two down the line you start to relapse they'll put you back on their books again. There's also housing support, which in my case looks like it will be ongoing, and help from local charities, coordinated by MIND (a national charity) that helps get you back into work, or voluntary work, as you see fit. They also help you find social activities (music, art, study etc) which get you out in the community.

Is there anything like that in the US? There's also respite care here as well, so people with mental health issues can have a short residential holiday for example, and their carers can have a break, or families can have a holiday together.

I hope someone reading this in the US can put it all together for you, and find some dedicated services that will help your son. Fingers crossed for both of you.